The Emoji Movie Broke Me 1/10

How should I put this. Remember that scene in 'A Clockwork Orange' when Alex was forced to watch horrific images on screen against his will? I would rather go through that level of torture than have to sit through this disgraceful abomination of a movie one more time. This film makes you check the time so often that your neck starts to hurt. No easy task for a film that narrowly scrapes past the 1 hour 20 minute mark.

So whats the story you may ask. I wont even dignify the film with a description because the sad truth is you've already seen it. If you watched either 'Wreck it Ralph', 'Inside Out' or 'Toy Story' there is literally no reason to see this. The unoriginality of this film will make you question why you even thought this had a slightest chance to be successful, let alone mediocre. And yes mediocre was the bar set by this movie and it couldn't even accomplish that.

The Emoji Movie

Sony has a habit of being absolutely shameful with its product placement but this 'film' takes it to an entirely new level. It is clear to me how this film was funded when there is a ten minute segment all about Candy Crush, another segment on a Just Dance app, and lets not forget their main objective of the film. TO GET TO DROPBOX!!! Its like the film has become self aware and is reaching out at you and slapping you around the face reminding you that you paid money to see this.

Honestly I didn't think I would get this angry about something so not worth my time but these films (mainly by Sony Animation Studios) are a clear indication that Hollywood has well and truly given up making decent flicks. Actual human beings worked on this, they wrote the script, they sent it across many producers and executives before they all decided "Yep thats good, put that out". As a filmmaker this makes me incredibly worried as it shows all the passion and creativity that used to go into making films has well and truly been extinguished at this point.

And don't you dare say Im over exaggerating or that its "JUST A KIDS MOVIE"!!! Aladdin is just a kids movie, The Lion King is just a kids movie, Beauty and the Beast (Nominated for best film Oscar) is apparently just a kids movie. But heres the counter argument. They were all GOOD!!!!

Parents if you belittle your children's intelligence by forcing them to watch utter garbage for an hour and a half because parenting is hard work then you have failed as a parent. Take some goddam responsibility and show them something that doesn't destroy brain cells. Because I promise you, young children are going to remember films like Wreck it Ralph or Beauty and the Beast, not a smartphone app version of the Care Bears Movie.

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